Email From Hawaii

"Healing Sea"

Healing Sea

The following is an email from a dear friend I have not yet met in person.

When we first met through the blog she was shy and not able to speak openly about suicide. But she took to reading the blog every day, and every day we held each other gently by the hand.
I always encouraged her to talk and share but she couldn’t yet. Then I started talking a bout the Fair, she would have suggestions and I would say to her:

“Why don’t you take charge of that?” she wouldn’t respond for a while and then…. Well read for yourself.

Dear Rayo,
thank you for everything. I can’t wait either for all of us to stand together, tried but intact, with so much behind us but still with love and life around us, in this world and in the next.

And good luck with your Master!

From your fellow mother-suicide-survivor,


Those sound like appropriate cards.

Have the Break the Silence wristbands arrived yet?
Denise said she shipped them a week or so ago. I got one from the Prevent Suicide Hawaii Task Force meeting I attended Aug 19. Since then I have worn it and have stepped out of my comfort zone and have really broke the silence twice.
One at work and just yesterday with the woman who cuts my hair…and to everyone else in the full salon that I know was eavesdropping on our conversation. Wow! It’s so hard for me to say the word suicide and “my son died by suicide” out loud.
But I am grateful for these conversations to be able to educate where myths and ignorance exist.

In 2.5 weeks I will be on a plane headed east!

Talk about “Healing Action” ( the theme for this year of my life A. D. ).

Thank you Esmeralda!

I am looking forward to meeting you and your family, Shannon, Dempsey and the others.
I am looking forward to spending time with my baby brother (lol) and his family and seeing my son’s friend Melissa.
And I am looking forward to learning yoga…if there’s one thing at the Fair I’d like to do :). I’m looking forward to “being” at the Fair in the Park.

…I’m rambling now…thinking about how many special things will be taking place in my life in the next few months…
There’s a Healing Our Spirits indigenous conference that our school will have opportunity to be involved.

There’s the PSHTF events during the 1st week in Sept

Then the GYWO Fair. (Debriefing and planning for next year ;)? )

October I will celebrate my 50th birthday…all month! Ha! And the Laie Hawaii LDS Temple will have open houses for the community through Nov before it is rededicated.

November will be the Temple Rededication and the PSHTF suicide survivors Awareness Walk and Conference.

And through all this I will be writing my Masters paper so I can graduate in December…

Healing Action indeed!

Well, enough rambling… I enjoyed reading your posts from Italia. I breathed in the sea breezes and sunshine. I imagine it much like Hawaii… Warm people and more relaxed

And I read your post today…rest my friend. I remember the week in Sept last year when I could not will myself to get out of bed to go to work. Grieving is hard work and exhausting…I still cry…I think I will forever until time and worlds no longer separate my son and I.

Rest, heal…be…and be well…

I’ll close with a poem one of my students shared with me this week…typos and all :)… Bc life has typos but it’s still good.

Life is magical
life is good
life can be tuff
life is to short
lets not waste life by sitting around
and hating people or life
get up get out and make friends

by Kanoe

– Show quoted text –

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