Early this morning I woke up, after a while I went back to sleep and I dreamt of Andrew. In the dream he was eleven.
He came out of an elevator, rushed up to me, threw himself into my arms and almost knocked me over with all the energy and uninhibited joy, typical of a young child.
He hugged me and kissed me, and what’s more he let me kiss him.
You see, as he grew older, Andrew became a bit impatient with all my kisses.
Andrew had said hi to me in the car yesterday.
Some of you know that Andrew makes the CD, Century Child by Nightwish pop out of the CD player in the Mini. It doesn’t happen all the time, but it does seem to happen when something “is going on.”
Sometimes I just open the car door and the CD comes out then goes back in, the duration of the CD staying out varies. Sometimes I open the door, sit in the car and the CD pops out. Basically it always happens before I insert the key and turn the ignition on.
When he said hi to me yesterday, I asked Andrew how he was. I asked him to find a way to let me know, maybe by popping in and out of the CD player as he had done once. Three time for “I am well” … I didn’t suggest anything for “I am not well.”
In the dream, he was rushing around even though he was wearing some sort of blue metal leg-thingy to support him.
Other than that, he looked well, beautiful… he was my Andrew.
I asked him if he was well and he indicated that yes, he was well.
I asked him where he was, but I am not sure what his answer was, it seemed vague.
I asked him what he did there and he said something that seemed to have to do with fish.
Finally I asked him if he has seen God, and he said yes. And then it seemed that I was asking too many questions so he dashed inside an elevator and disappeared. A little while later he came back though, rushed into my arms again, gave me tons of kisses before disappearing again.
When I woke up I realized that I was smiling. I could “feel” the smile on my face and after a few seconds I “remembered.”
Thank you my darling, sweet, kind, attentive, compassionate, generous son.
Thank you my beloved Andrew, for listening to the question in my heart, and for having personally come to answer it.
Please take care.
Lots of love.